You’re not the centre of the universe. In fact, no one really cares about you.
Sounds harsh, but it’s true.
I have experienced people worrying, wondering and completely agonised before saying or doing anything, of what someone else might think of them. The fear of what ‘other people’ might think sadly tainting their work and holding them back from whatever they might be willing to say or do in their professional, personal or social life. But does this really matter – the opinions / thoughts of other people? Do they even care to give you a suggestion or opinion, on something which is intensely significant for you? Do they really even spare a minute to give it a thought? I don’t think so.
Sure, you have your immediate family and a few close friends, they will take particular interest in various parts of your life, helping you when needed. But they don’t care about you nearly as much as you care about yourself. Ultimately, you’re not top of the mind to anyone but yourself. When properly understood, this is incredibly freeing and valuable.
Do you know, it is easy to feel uncared for when people aren’t able to communicate and connect with you in the way you need. And it’s so hard not to internalize that silence as a reflection on your worth. But the truth is that the way other people operate is not about you or your life. It’s only about them. People are often unreasonable and self – centered. Nothing others (people) do is because of you. Whatever they say or do is the projection of their own reality, their own dreams. You need to get immune to such kind of behaviour to escape needless suffering.
Stress, anxiety and depression are caused when we are living to please others – Paulo Coelho.
But the story has its other side too. Let me explain.
Mostly people are so caught up in their own responsibilities, struggles and anxiety that the thought of even asking someone else how they’re doing doesn’t even cross their mind. Instead they might straightforwardly end up asking you for a favour. For sure, they aren’t characteristically bad or uncaring, instead they may be just busy and self-focused. And that’s ok. It is not an evidence of some fundamental failing on your part. It doesn’t make you unwanted, unlovable or invisible either. It just means that those people are not very good at looking beyond their own world. But the fact that you are – that despite the gloominess you feel, you have the ability to share your love and light with others – is a strength.
Remember, that your work isn’t to change who you are (to make others comfortable); it’s to find the people who are able to give you connection or support you need and to keep doing what you want to do, as this is your right. It doesn’t matter what others think (even if they do think about you, at all) – but that’s what they will think in any case. Overcome your fear of being ignored, laughed at or uncared for. Because despite that you feel, you are not too sensitive or too needy. You are thoughtful and empathetic. You are compassionate and kind. And with or without anyone’s acknowledgement or affection, you are enough. Don’t forget, the best part of you is you. Know that your best friend can only be your own ‘soul’.
And isn’t that the great thing to realise?
Stop looking for people to give you sympathy or show concern and start creating the life story you want to read. Here (in this world) everyone is chasing happiness in their own weird or wise ways. So, appreciate who you are and honour your life. It is always about you, none other. The whole idea of life is for you to be happy, which is not dependent on anyone else’s opinions, but you.
Your destiny will never lead you to do something that would make you unhappy – Robin Sharma.
Respect your instincts, pursue your desires, believe in your potential and stay true to your passions. Most importantly trust yourself as a person when others don’t. To sum up all – just be authentic. Stay true and committed to yourself. Undeniably, this attitude will never let you down, as you will always be available for your own being.
“Being selfish is being truly your own self. So be selfish to be content. It will help you without harming anyone else.”
Now, isn’t that liberating!!!